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Monday, August 2, 2010

Life in La La Land

I have been so out of it lately. I think it's the pain meds
I've been taking after my CI surgery. It's like my brain has
gone on vacation and my reflexes are working at half power.

On Saturday, my family was away the entire day to attend my
cousin's wedding. There was no way I would survive the
wedding. Too weak and tired. So I had to stay home.

I was home alone but not totally on my own. The neighbors were
checking in on me periodically. Just peeping in to make sure I
was still alive, I guess. I also communicated with the neighbors
and my father via text messages. I felt secure enough.

The trouble came at dinner time. I decided to make soup. Yes,
soup in July. But I love soup and it's very easy to make in a
Hot Shot.

I poured a cup of water into the bowl of the Hot Shot device.
Then I poured the soup mix into the cup and moved it in place
under the dispenser. I was shocked to find water all over the
counter. I looked in the bowl and it was empty. I figured that
in my drugged state, I had totally missed the bowl and poured
water all over the place.

So I got another cup and poured that in. I watched in amazement
as it came right out the dispenser and spilled over the counter.
I was open-mouthed and dumb-founded as I watched this mess

I fiddled with the dispenser and thought I had fixed the problem.
So then I poured yet a third cup in the bowl. A properly
functioning person would have placed an extra cup under the
dispenser before putting more water in the bowl. It never
occurred to me. And once again, the water spilled over the
counter. I tried to get a cup in place but I was way too slow.

I had to clean up the counter three times during this stupid
ordeal. Finally, I gave up on the Hot Shot and put the water in
the microwave.

Sadly to say, this soggy saga was not yet over. I found myself
with two cups. One had soup mix in it. The other was full of
hot water. What to do?

Obviously, you pour the soup mix into the cup with water. My
"obvious sensors" were not functioning. I tried to pour the hot
water into the cup with the soup mix. I missed the cup and
poured half the water over the counter.

I'm starting to see why people aren't allowed to operate complex
machinery while taking strong medication. In my case, I can't
even operate simple things like a Hot Shot.

My parents came home later and I told them what happened. My dad
played with the Hot Shot and told me there's something wrong with
the dispenser. Yeah, I noticed that when I flooded the kitchen
three times.

My cousin got married. My Hot Shot isn't working. My brain is
fried. Here's happy greetings from La La Land. I think I'll go
back to bed.

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